[For Kon]

[happy_dsign]

All things considered, Daphne had liked Victorian island better than Wild West island. The clothes had been more flattering, for one. She'd preferred the scenery, too. But no one had consulted her, so she was making the best of things.

She was dressed in a dress that made her feel a little silly, a matching bonnet that did at least keep the sun off her face, and calf-high lace-up boots, sturdy and sensible. She had a book tucked under one arm and a basket with some muffins and cheese and bread and juice, in case she got hungry. She wandered the settlement for a while before finally finding a bench in the shade of one of the buildings. She tucked the basket beneath the bench, settled down comfortably, and began to read Tom Sawyer.

Comments

[happy_dsign]

Daphne wrinkled her nose at that. "Maybe we could come up with something better to do. In fact, I'm pretty sure we can top that, at least."

[not_the_s]

Kon laughed. "Like what did you have in mind? More harrowing adventures with paintball guns out in the jungle?" He had to admit that he'd had a good time out there with her. He wasn't sure what it was, but he really enjoyed going out and spending time with her.

[happy_dsign]

"I was thinking of something else," Daphne answered with a grin. Then she leaned in, resting a hand on his shoulder, and kissed him softly.

[not_the_s]

She was kissing him. Elation shot through him which was quickly replaced by an apprehension that felt like a black hole in the pit of his stomach. He sucked at relationships. This was a proven fact. He was just bad at them and it wasn't fair to put Daphne through that.

He pulled back after what seemed like too long and murmured words against her lips that he knew she wouldn't be able to understand. Maybe if she didn't hear them, he could pretend just a little longer.

"This is a bad idea."

[happy_dsign]

Daphne felt his lips move but ignored it. She didn't want to talk right now, there were better things to do than talking. "Shh," she hissed against his mouth and kissed him again, harder this time.

[not_the_s]

Oh, he wanted to give into that kiss. He almost did, too, leaning into in and closing his eyes. Memories of all the other times he had failed came rushing back. And maybe he could get over it, but he wasn’t there yet and he didn't want to drag Daphne down with him.

With a quiet sigh, he pulled away and waited until she was looking at him.

"This is a bad idea, Daphne. I'm sorry." He couldn't quite bring himself to say that he didn't want this, but he was set that this was a bad idea

[happy_dsign]

Daphne frowned at the words, then scooted away. "Sorry. I guess I misread the situation," she muttered, the rejection stinging. It had seemed like such a simple solution when Kate had suggested it, but actually doing it and getting shot down? Sucked.

[not_the_s]

"No, it's..." Kon sighed and shook his head. "You deserve better than me." But of course, now he'd made her unhappy which was exactly what he'd wanted to avoid in the first place. He just couldn't win, could he? And neither, it seemed, could she.

"I'm sorry." He looked down and away from her.

[happy_dsign]

Daphne shook her head. "Whatever. It's fine." She felt like an idiot, after all of the wondering and hoping she'd done for the last few months.

[not_the_s]

Kon's shoulders slumped and he felt more than a little sick. It wasn't fine, even he could see that, but he wasn't sure he could fix it. "I should...should I go? I should go."

[happy_dsign]

It would be fine, probably, once Daphne was less mortified, but right now she kind of had to agree. "Probably." She sighed and looked down at her hands. That was one thing that sucked about lipreading. You had to look at the person to do it, and right now she didn't really want to look at him, want him to see her face. She knew her emotions were probably written all over it.

[not_the_s]

Kon opened his mouth and then shut it again when she looked away. He knew it did and yet he also knew that he'd dug his own grave. He tried to tell himself that it was going to be better this way. It was going to be better for her, at least. For him, it would just be like ripping off a bandaid millimeter by millimeter as excruciatingly slowly as possible. He just stood up and started walking away, looking back every few steps.

[happy_dsign]

Daphne kept her head down as she felt him stand up and start walking away, blinking a few times as her eyes prickled with unshed tears. Then she squared her shoulders and lifted her head, picking up her book again, though she had no desire to read anymore. She just sat and stared into the distance, considering how horribly that had all gone and hoping she hadn't just ruined their friendship by trying to make it more.